my alter ego?

megan hill: ...great versatility... should enable her to quickly adapt to a high level of play ... great attitude and mentality is motivating to teammates. GO NAVY! HAHA (provided by google image search for megan hill)

why i suck

i've mulled it over in my head and i feel like a big jerk for my thoughts on last night's date. i thank you kind friends for sending your words of wisdom about my lame dating philosophy, enlightening me to think otherwise. you cannot judge someone by one meeting. it's impossible. i've just been one for gut feelings, that's all. i've always gone with my instincs but let's take a good hard look at where it's gotten me. yes ladies and gentlemen, i'm still single. i kind of pride myself on being picky with men but let's not forget some of the lame-o's i've ended up with. it'd be nice to try a new way. getting to know someone gradually instead of jumping on them the first night, getting hot and heavy the next few months and then letting the fire die because all you really had in common was steamy loving. new experiment... wait it out, take it slowly and see what happens. that's what i'd like to do next time. i'm still a jerk, but a jerk who's trying to learn from her past mistakes and make herself better. the end.

no sex and the city

dating. what a novel concept. i don't think i've ever really "dated" before. the way it's worked for me in the past is i usually like a boy, go out with him and then he's my boyfriend. or not. but i've never done this "testing the waters" with different guys sort of thing. and i'm still not totally sure how i feel about it. i'm not possitive how to handle the situation.

last night i went on an actual proper date. it's been about a year since i've done that. i met this nice young man (let me emphasize the word young) last week at a function. he was cute and very smart and we had a lot to talk about. we were both a little tipsy, the conversation flowed nicely and i gave him my number. like a good boy, he called me the next day to set up a date. huh. i like when things work that way.

so i met him at a lovely italian restaurant last night in williamsburg. i was sort of dreading the whole "official date" thing. i usually prefer a casual encounter because for some reason the dinner thing puts an added pressure on an evening. but it was fine. i think he was a little nervous as the coversation started out a little forced. but as the wine flowed, so did the chatting.

after dinner we headed to this awesome bar. super french (like this boy), great atmosphere and a fantastic african jazzy band. loved it. we drank mint tea and talked about dating histories (always a fun topic of conversation on a first date... allows one to gage what the other is thinking... like are they into just dating or a serious something). this boy seemed pretty into me, complimenting me, saying how he was having such a nice time, bla bla bla. these are usually good things, but i'm an asshole and made me doubt him. i don't know. i suck. he was a perfect gentleman. he's very intelligent, was funny and sweet, is ambitious with a great job, the whole bit. and i just don't know how i feel. he seemed to be missing that certain something that makes me giddy for a boy at first. like he's not a poor as fuck asshole who treats me shitty. goddammit. will i ever learn???

the question is, do i go out with him again? i had a very nice time with him. i'm sure he would treat me wonderfully and we'd continue to have fun times. BUT i don't know if he's someone that would grow on me or not. can you continue going on dates with someone without it leading to sex right away? perhaps an experiment is in order... can it be done?

my new bike

my new bike
Originally uploaded by megasoul.

check it! this was my weekend purchase. freedom on the streets on NYC. look out summer, here i come!

hurts so good.

i've lived in nyc for a little over a year and a half now and i finally found my ideal african dance class last night. YAY!! besides my friends, the main thing i miss about LA is my african dance class... the famous nigerian dance and drum ensemble taught by omowali with drums lead by her husband, francis awe. i always looked forward to wednesday nights... heading down to pico and la brea to "move that back" and sweat to the drums. it was always a spiritually uplifting experience and since i've been in ny, i've really missed it.

i honestly didn't make a huge effort to find an equivalent class in ny just because i knew there could never be a replacement for omowali and awe's class. i had heard about djoniba dance and drum center but i was wasn't convinced. i did actually take a class there when i first got here. it was something like haitan and was really really really hard, thus detering me from going back. i kind of gave up on finding the perfect class.

well, it just so turned out that one of my friend's had been taking djoniba's class all winter long. when i got back last weekend i had an email telling me that she was going to be in a performance for the center. so i went, hoping that i'd be inspired to go back. that was just what the doctor ordered. those drums! those hotties playing the drums! the dance moves! the energy! and the widely diverse group of men and women performing made me want to check it out for sure.

so i went to djoniba's class last night and it was GREAT!!!! granted, it's no nigerian talking drum ensemble, but it was damn close. the warm-up was super intense. i haven't done that many crunches and leg lifts in years (and man, do i feel the pain today. ouch!!). then was the break-down of a routine which i actually amazingly caught on to. next the drummers came in and wailed on those skins. the energy in the room was buzzing. and then we did the routine, ten times faster then we had learned it of course.i couldn't quite keep up but with a little more practice, i think i'll be just fine. so excited... i can already visualize my new hard bod. HA!

hipper than thou

ah williamsburg. the mecca for wanna-be cools. i still can't quite figure out how such a seemingly small area encompasses so many youngsters that are too hip for their own good. it boggles the mind.

last night was my friend's benefit fashion show. it was for a good cause. support for the north brooklyn alliance, hosted by this cool store in williamsburg. needless to say it drew a rather interesting crowd. there were some of the strangest outfits imaginable. i just can't see how some one can look in the mirror wearing a small, weird shaped piece of fabric they call a dress, with their free-flowing tits all over the place, bad un-brushed hair, ugly old moccassin boots and think they look good. i guess it's that "i'm too cool for fashion" fashionista thing. or something. i don't get it.

even though some of the outfits were strange, the crowd was enthusiastic and full of energy, whooping it up and hollering for their friends' designs. and it wasn't your standard fashion show either. each designer came up with a routine for their models. it was more like a performance which was pretty fun. the acts ranged from song and dance numbers, to hoopers (yes ariel, hoopers!), acrobats, and strippers. and there were a few actual performers in between designers. my favorite was a woman who freakin rocked it! she did a strip tease that may be the best strip tease i've ever seen. first the dress came off, then the bra, then the pasties, then the underwear. as she strut around totally butt naked, she actually lip synced the rock song with her butt cheeks. then faced forward and lip synced with her "other" lips. i was dying. and although it sounds nasty, it was pretty rad.

the night ended at the after party at capone's (yes terra, the free pizza place!!). when you order a beer, you get a free delicious pizza. what a deal!! i chatted it up with a nice young french boy. a smarty stanford grad. and i'll just stop it right there. loving spring time in NYC! weeeeeee.........

happy to be back

at the moment, NY is the most beautiful i've ever seen it. it's been absolutely perfect weather since i got back... sunny, blue skies, cool breeze. and the blossoms are outrageous. my park, fort greene park, is a vision of perfect spring time activity. kids out playing, adults having picnics, people tossing the frisbee, young folks reading on a blanket on the hill. pure springy joy! i'm definitely enjoying the return. kinda planned that one just right.

unfortunately, i've been super buys (still) and can't run around and play outside. i got some good weekend chilling in, but now that it's back to the work week, i gotta get to it. juggling 6 projects which have me a little stressed out, but it's all getting done and there will finally be a little cash flowage coming through. which means i can pay off my debt and start saving for the next trip.

i'm still set on south america, but africa has been calling my name too. in the book i'm reading right now (yes, another travel book) the traveler is in kenya and it just seems amazing. i never had a huge desire to go, but recently i'm fascinated. and to top it off, i got sucked into a PBS program last night about animals emotions. i don't know what got into me but it was like a waterworks show. every little story about these amazing animals had me tearing up. the mere-cats of africa staying with their dying mother til the bitter end. the momma elephant who saved her baby who fell in the quick sand. and oh god, the real tear-jerker... the dog who risked his own life to save the little boy. jeezus! i was a blubbering idiot and laughing at myself for bawling over a tv show. needless to say, i'd love to be up close and personal with animals in their own habitats in africa some day. more travelling to come. but first, some NY spring time adventures. i promise i'll have a good city story next time i write.

SPRING!!

yellow up close
Originally uploaded by megasoul.

spring time is in full effect in NYC. LOVING!

can't make up my mind

i know i've changed this damn blog template a bunch of times and i apologize for my inability to make a decision and stick with it. if it were up to me, i'd design my own damn blog template, but i can't deal with a bunch of code right now, when all i really have to do is choose one of the 20 templates blogger gives me and click "use this template." it's too easy and i'm lazy, ok? maybe someday i'll get off my ass and do it, but for now, i've gone back to the original. clean, simple, a little bubbly with a touch of design. the last one was nice for a while, but amy was right, it was a little on the pirate-y side (and the sidebar was pain to change). so here you are. hopefully i'll stick with this one (until they decide to come up with some new fancy templates).
if you'll notice, i added some links in the sidebar. please check out the suba ud site and the handy paypal donation button. it's easy to donate now. even just a couple bucks will help!
and if i you have a site i left out, lemme know!

D.I.Y.

sorry for the lack of posts lately. honestly i haven't had much to report. just been working my little hiney off. so many projects and too little time. happy to be back into a good work flow through. been quite productive and feel good for it.

not only have i accomplished design projects, but this weekend also proved to be very rewarding in the D.I.Y. department. my grandma's old house has been for sale for some time and hasn't sold yet. i've sort of been in charge of getting it in shape so that it will sell more quickly and my mom and i took care of business over the weekend. i've never done so much manual labor and i must admit, i liked it. working with my hands, planting little plants in the yard, raking, making a cool planter, screwing in hardware, priming and painting a deck and on and on. the place looks ten million times better than it did and i just hope the damn thing sells soon. think good thoughts.

i think it's hilarious that upon entering the 30s, i have more than one friend dealing with real estate. both buying and selling. i remember hearing my parents talking about escrow and refinancing and equity and interest rates and never knowing what any of it meant. now all of a sudden, i do! guess it's all just part of growing up.

country bumpkin in the big city

for the first time in a long time, i felt like i was a rural hick in the big city. a true bridge and tunnel-er, if you will. i'd been down in fallbrook for a week and a half with not much to do but work and watch the old tellie. i don't really have any friends left down here. and the ones that are here are married with lots of babies... so we don't have a whole lot in common. not to mention the nightlife situation here is pretty much non-existent. sure i could make my way over to ron's red eyed saloon for a couple tall ones with the local winos. or i could head over to ringers for some country karaoke. riiiight!

so instead, i played it cool for the week and headed up to LA for the weekend. by the time i got up there it was like i had been couped up for a long time, because i really felt the need to let loose. haven't had that feeling in some time. i wanted to be out with the people, drink a bit, hear some tunes, and dance. and i did just that. it was a weekend full of socializing. from old LA friends, to old college buddies, to former co-workers, even my old roommate! the weekend was action packed and now that i'm back down in fallbrook, i'm kinda happy to be amongst the peace and quiet again. LA can be an amazingly fun place, but all that socializing gets tiresome. damn, i guess i am turning into an old lady!